Count the Stars
by Neo the Saiyan angel
Summary: She's back. After numerous millennia, she's back. But Pearl hesitates.


Pearl hesitated.

The current situation was...out of her depth. Out of any Gem's depth. This sort of thing had never happened in the history of anything. Steven and his creation had been one-of-a-kind. Only Rose knew how it was done.

Steven had moved on. It was inevitable. They all saw it coming. Every moment was cherished. And when he finally left, surrounded by loved ones—

It was a shock. Completely unexpected. Once she had reformed, opened her eyes, saw everyone around her, _she knew_. Somehow, she knew enough of what had happened to know he was gone and she had taken his place. She had gotten up and left from the cozy little corner of the beach that they had gathered at. No one stopped her. What could any of them even _say_?

It had been a few minutes before anyone did anything. Garnet was the first. She'd immediately split everyone up into groups to try and find her. Rose's room, the gardens, the sky arena...anywhere she might have gone.

Everyone rushed off save Pearl. Because Pearl knew where she had gone.

Pearl was standing in front of the temple door, the door keyed to her room. She took an unnecessary breath in, then out.

Then she walked into her room.

The door closed quietly behind her. In front, her various little unending waterfall platforms stood, waiting for her to dance on them. And up top, on the highest one...

Her tufts of pink hair were visible even from where Pearl was. She was still, looking to be staring off somewhere.

Pearl carefully made her way up her platforms to the tallest one. She landed as gracefully as ever mere feet from her. There was, again, hesitation, but only momentarily. Pearl walked over until she was standing next to the most precious Gem to her.

Rose said nothing, still staring off into the depths of Pearl's room. Her legs dangled over the edge as the water spilled around her. Pearl decided it was best not to speak. Rose would talk when she was ready. Instead, Pearl sat down next to her, tucking her legs underneath her.

"This is real, isn't it?"

Pearl looked over at Rose. The Diamond's eyes were still gazing off into the nothing, but Pearl could feel her also looking over at her.

"This is real? Not a dream?" Rose repeated.

"...Yes, Rose. This is all real," Pearl answered, not entirely sure where Rose was coming from with her question.

It was silent for a good while longer. Rose ran her fingers through the water, apparently just taking in the feel of it against her form.

This time, Pearl was the one that broke the quiet. "Steven...he said you were..._gone_."

"I _was_ gone." There was a strange wonder in her voice as she said it. "I don't know where, or when, or _how_, but I wasn't here. Steven was, not me. But...sometimes...I saw what he saw. Like how humans dream. Little snippets here and there, half-remembered fragments." Now Rose looked over at Pearl. "And you were always there. Helping him. Taking care of him."

Pearl frowned. "How could I not? He was your legacy!" Her hands spread out as if making a case. "It would have been a tarnish on your memory if I had abandoned him!"

"It was more than that though, wasn't it? You loved him like he was your own."

The plain, gentle warmth in Rose's voice sent shivers through Pearl's form. The truth, and the voice stating it, made her feel a mild pinch of sadness.

"Yes. He _was_ mine. Mine, Garnet's, Amethyst's..." Pearl shook her head. "He was all of ours."

"I...was selfish. What I did—everything I did—was so selfish," Rose murmured suddenly.

"Wh—what?" Pearl did a double-take. Rose's head was bent down, staring down at the falling water. Pearl stopped herself from reassuring Rose that she was wrong. That she was so giving, and loving, and wise...

But that was a lie. Steven dealing with the repercussions of Rose's choices said as much. It was an old instinct and worship of Rose that had popped up to almost make her say lies. Rose needed the truth.

"Yes, you were," Pearl agreed honestly. "All your decisions were what you wanted to make yourself happy. You didn't think about anyone else when you made them. Only yourself."

"I remember...Spinel. I abandoned her. Blue, she was consumed with grief. You, Garnet, Amethyst, Greg, I left you with the burden of my son without even asking what any of you thought. And I left Steven alone." Rose sighed. "All because I couldn't face all the consequences of my actions."

Pearl reached out, hand pausing only a moment before settling on Rose's arm. "It's okay, Rose. It's fine. Everything turned out good. Great, even!" A grin lit up Pearl's face as she said, "There were all kinds of adventures! Watching Steven grow into the young man he was was a privilege. Even with your bad choices..." She rubbed Rose's arm. "Things turned out the best way they could've."

Rose looked over at Pearl, tears in her eyes. "Yes. Steven succeeded where I failed. Thanks to the guidance you three gave him." She blinked, some tears falling in small globs down her cheeks. "Thank you."

Pearl smiled. "I would do anything for you, Rose."

Sadness once again clouded Rose's face. "Your programming. Even after all my commands—maybe _because_ of them—you still listen to me even when you shouldn't."

Pearl balked momentarily. Then anger flooded her. Rose's comment made it sound like Pearl had no agency! That she was just doing it because Rose wanted it!

Pearl, bristling, growled, "Ex_cuse_ me?! I certainly hope you're not saying what you seem to mean!"

Rose looked surprised. "Pearl...?"

"You come back after _all this time_ and the _first_ things you say to me are self-pitying and questioning my own choices?!" Pearl stood up; she still wasn't as big as Rose, but she felt it would get her statements across better. "No! You're wrong as far as where I'm concerned!" She frowned deeply as she said, "Yes, it's true that I used to follow you like a lovesick puppy. But that isn't true anymore! I'm free. Well and truly free, just like you always wanted me to be. I make my _own_ choices now. And..." her frown softened "...and I choose to be here, with you."

Rose sat, gobsmacked, listening to Pearl's tirade. More tears fell as she mumbled, "You've _never_ yelled at me before."

Pearl didn't move. She stared hard into Rose's eyes, trying to get her point across. "I'm trying to get you to understand that _I'm me_. Not Rose's pearl. Not Pink Diamond's pearl. I'm just me. Pearl. And you need to understand that Steven succeeded in your goals. That we're all free. Free to choose what we want."

Then Pearl bent over and hugged Rose tightly. "And even after all these years, I still choose you, Rose. You might have ultimately been selfish, but your heart was mostly in the right place. You tried to make things better in our hierarchical society of pegs and holes. Thank you for helping to set us free. And, and thank you for letting me love you."

Rose was frozen in Pearl's arms. It didn't matter. If Rose rejected her, it was fine. Pearl had held the words in for countless millennia. All it had done was hurt her. Now that it was out in the open, even if it wasn't reciprocated, Pearl could finally fully move on.

"I...never _knew_," Rose breathed after a few more moments. "I, I always thought it was a carryover of your programmed loyalty. That even with me pushing you to be free you _still_ couldn't disobey. My command to you to never speak of me being Pink Diamond said as much. But, but you..."

"I'm free," Pearl repeated. "Free to choose what I want. _You're _what I want. Need. You complete me, Rose Quartz. I've grown, yet there's that spot where you've always belonged."

It was another long moment before Rose's arms slowly snaked their way around Pearl's. "I never thought about it. Us. Being together. There was such a power imbalance between us."

"Not anymore." Pearl suddenly hefted Rose to her feet. "Now we're simply Rose Quartz and Pearl. Two Gems who are free to pick what they want."

"And you pick me," Rose said in wonder.

"And I pick you."

A soft smile grew on Rose's lips. Then it exploded into a joyous full-mouth smile. Laughter escaped her throat as she pulled Pearl close to her.

The two of them began spinning across the platform in a silly, loose dance that was unlike Pearl's normal controlled movements. Pearl began laughing alongside Rose as they danced.

Then two became one in a sparkling flash of light.

Rainbow Quartz opened her eyes for the first time in millennia. And all was right in the world.


End file.
